The children were all lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary school for lunch. At the head of the table was a large pile of apples. The nun made a note, and posted on the apple tray: “Take only ONE. God is watching.”
Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies.
A child had written a note, “Take all you want. God is watching the apples.”
Recently, there have been rumors that Boston Bruins forward Glen Murray (who has two years remaining on his contract after this year) may be traded to his former team, The Los Angeles Kings sometime in the off-season. Kings’ blogger Rudy Kelley at The Battle of California, weighs in with his feelings on this possible trade:
“I liked Glen Murray when he was on the Kings and I’m sure he’s a pleasant enough guy, but I’d rather eat a baby than have him on the Kings for the next two years.”
From Firebox.com:
It seems everyone is obsessed about their weight these days. Too fat, too thin, size zero this, obese that. The whole weight debate is enough to make you want to smash up the bathroom scales and start again.
And that’s pretty much what the makers of the hilarious Celebrity Weighing Scales have done, because they’ve dispensed with traditional units of measurement and replaced them with the names of celebrities, historical figures and even a few calorifically-challenged fictional characters.
With this deeply ironic set of scales you get to compare your weight with the likes of Fozzie Bear, Mr Ed (yes, the talking horse!), Donald Trump’s Combover and even the Baby Jesus. Just think, with a set of Celebrity Weighing Scales in the bathroom you’ll be itching to step aboard, not dreading the prospect.
Nothing quite like being told you weigh the same as a horse to boost your confidence.
Anyone who knows me, knows I love salads. I eat a ton of them, and in order to keep them interesting, I usually have about 10 different salad dressings on hand so I can change things up on a nightly basis.
Pretty recently, I discovered the best salad dressing I have ever had: Three Cheese Ranch. It’s amazing. I’m not even a fan of ranch dressing, but this stuff is incredible. If you haven’t tried it yet… go buy some tonight!
Apparently spanking isn’t effective enough.
From KOMOTV:
Bradley Bernstein’s parents say an electric cattle prod is the only thing that stops him from banging his head and violently punching his eyes, nearly blinding himself.
The Illinois couple’s fight to continue shock treatment on their severely autistic 48-year-old son and the uproar over a Massachusetts school that uses similar treatment, have pulled back the curtain on this extreme form of behavior modification. Critics call it outmoded, barbaric and unethical.
[...]
The school is under legislative and regulatory scrutiny for routinely using skin shocks on about half its 230 students to stop serious behavior problems, including self-injury.
Electric shocks and other painful or unpleasant treatments known as “aversive conditioning” were accepted more a generation ago. But mainstream psychiatry relies on new drugs and other methods that have proven effective.
Hmm… taking a pill or getting shocked with an electric cattle prod? Which would you choose?
Even I have to admit, this is pretty cute (watch until the end)…
Four men went golfing together one day; three headed to the first tee and one went into the club house to take care of the bill. The three men started talking, bragging about their sons. The first man told the others, “My son is a home builder and he”s so successful that he gave a friend a new home – for free.”
The second man said, “My son was a car salesman and now he owns a multi-line dealership. He”s so successful that he gave a friend two Cadillacs.”
The third man, not wanting to be outdone bragged, “My son is a stock broker and he”s doing so well that he gave his friend an entire stock portfolio.”
The fourth man joined them on the tee after a few minutes of taking care of business. The first man mentioned, “We were just talking about our sons. How is yours doing?”
The fourth man replied, “Well, my son is gay. I”m not totally thrilled about it, but he must be good. His last three boyfriends gave him a house, two cars, and a stock portfolio.”
How about this for a drinking mug? This cup will actually talk to you and remind you when it’s time to fill up.
You can buy one here for $38.99 US.
I loved the movie 300, so I decided to see how it all came about and picked up Frank Miller’s graphic novel of the same name.
Like most young boys, I loved comics as a kid. Superheros, art, cool stories… all things kids enjoy. 300 may have originally come out in comic form, but it is so much more than just a simple comic.
I was surprised to see how similar the book and the movie are. I didn’t realize how they pretty much translated the book directly to screen. The camera angles, the writing, and even the look of the characters is almost a dead-on transfer.
300 is a beautiful book. Miller’s art is incredible, and Lynn Varley doesn’t get enough credit for her excellent work in coloring the book. But above all, it’s the writing that makes everything come together. Miller’s writing is so far ahead of anything else I’ve read as far as comics go. All of those great lines in the film? That was all Frank Miller’s doing.
Even if you’re not a fan of comics, I’ll highly suggest picking up this book. It’s probably one of the best comic/graphic novels that I’ve ever read.
Love can make people do some pretty crazy things. If your girlfriend moves far away, what would you do to get her to move back? Show up at her doorstep and beg her to come back? Call her and tell her you miss her? How about bombing the new city she lives in to convice her it’s dangerous there?
From IOL:
Kragulj, 54, was sentenced to 10 months in prison and fined for planting five explosive devices in the southern town of Mostar in January.
Upon being arrested, Kragulj said he planted the bombs to prove to his long-time girlfriend that Mostar was dangerous and that she should return to their hometown of Prijedor, in the country’s north-west.
How does the girlfriend react to this?
Kragulj’s girlfriend had moved to Mostar after getting a waitressing job in the Majestic. She has since accepted his request to get married.
Eddie Griffin is an idiot. The rare Ferrari Enzo, owned by the producer of Griffin’s new movie Redline, is valued at more than a million dollars. Check out the video:
How cool are these? All it takes to make these is a specialty shaped ice tray; but instead of getting ice cubes, you get perfectly formed shot glasses.
From Amazon.com:
The coolest way to enjoy your favorite shots, this cool shooters ice shot mold is made of food-grade silicone, so it is nearly indestructible and can be used over and over again. Simply fill it with your choice of juice, then simply set it in the freezer to chill for a bit and viola! — You’ve got some ice cold shooters that pack a refreshing punch! Makes four ice shots at a time, be sure to order extra for the crowds! Shot glasses measure: 2″ x 2″ x 2.5″ tall each.
Amazon is currently sold out, but you can pick up a set here for only $6.99 US each.
Well, not quite. But, in lieu of the new Simpsons Movie opening later this year, some 7-11′s could be converting to “Kwik-E-Mart’s” to coincide with the release of the film.
From The Times Dispatch:
“If all goes as planned, the convenience store chain plans to refit 11 stores across the U.S. — Richmond is an unlikely choice — to resemble the front of the Kwik-E-Mart, the convenience store that Homer and other characters frequent in the classic cartoon TV series.
Customers also will be able to buy products inspired by the nearly two-decades-old show, including KrustyO’s cereal, Buzz Cola and iced Squishees (the cup says Squishee, but the contents will be Slurpee).”
That’s actually a pretty cool idea. Too bad they aren’t converting any here in British Columbia.
“The Simpsons Movie” hits theaters July 27, 2007.
I’ve done my Favorite TV Characters, so it’s about time I do a list of my Favorite TV shows. Keep in mind when reading, that I only watch the DVD sets of these shows, and haven’t seen any of the seasons that are currently airing on TV.
So, without wasting any time, here’s a list of my all-time favorite TV shows:
10. Lost
I’ve seen Seasons 1 & 2 of Lost, and enjoyed both very much. I’m looking forward to Season 3 coming out on DVD. I’d still say the best 1st episode of any show I’ve ever seen would would the first episode of Lost. It comes off like a movie, not like a TV show, and set the standard for new TV shows. I’ve still yet to see anything that compares with it. J.J. Abrams (the creator of Lost) is a genius, and this isn’t the only show of his to make my top 10 list.
9. Desperate Housewives
I owned Season 1 of Desperate Housewives for nearly a year before I finally decided to watch it. I pictured it to be a soap opera type of show that only appeals to women. Was I ever happy that I finally decided to watch it. As with Lost, I’ve only seen the first two seasons, as Season 3 isn’t on DVD yet, but were they ever entertaining. Housewives is a show that mixes a little bit of soap opera drama with mystery as well as comedy. It’s a show men and women alike can enjoy. I recommend the show to anyone, and if you had the same reservations as I had at the beginning, I highly suggest giving it a shot.
8. Prison Break
Prison Break would probably be higher on my list if there were more than one season available. It’s the only show on my list that I’ve seen less than two seasons of. It’s an excellent show, and although I doubted how it’s concept would last past 10-12 episodes, it kept me intrigued the entire show, and has me eagerly awaiting Season 2′s DVD release. Out of all the seasons I’ve watched, I think I finished Prison Break faster than any of them. 24 episodes in two days. Yeah, it’s that good.
7. Six Feet Under
I had the luxury of watching all five seasons of Six Feet Under in a row. I started it after the show was already off the air and all seasons had been released on DVD. I think this made the show all that much more enjoyable for me. It keeps the story lines fresh in your mind and by the time the show is over you feel like you really know these characters. I’d rate the series finale of Six Feet Under as, by far, the best series ending episode I have ever seen. This is not a high-paced show, and is not for everyone, but if you like character-based dramas, there isn’t much better than Six Feet Under.
6. The Shield
My Top 6 are the hardest to organize. Well, more like my 2nd to 6th. These could probably be put in any order on any particular day. But today, it’s The Shield that ranks sixth. The Shield is a gritty drama about somewhat corrupt cops. I love the way the show is filmed. It’s almost like a documentary, and the cinematography and camera work is excellent. Shield is a drama based on the cops that do the dirty work. Cleaning up the streets and shutting down drug dealers and other such criminals. Highly recommended show that unfortunately not many people have seen.
5. Alias
Another J.J. Abrams creation. I recently finished Season 5, which was the final season of Alias. It’s a show that had its ups-and-downs storyline wise, but in the end, it was always entertaining. There were some great characters, and I especially loved Jennifer Garner. I think she was the perfect choice for the role of Sidney Bristow. This is a show about the CIA and a secret organization called SD6. I can’t really get into much more of it, without giving up spoilers. Until seeing Season 5, I had forgotten just how much I enjoyed this show. It’s very fast paced, and has a great mix of suspense, action, and even some romance.
4. The Sopranos
The most popular show in the history of HBO, without a doubt. Is it the best? Probably. I have it ranked third as far as HBO shows go, but that’s more a statement of personal opinion rather than which show is the best. The acting is incredible, the story lines are near perfect, and everything just comes together wonderfully. It may not be my favorite show, but it is the most complete, well-made show ever made in my mind. After saying all of that, I’m starting to wonder why I’m not ranking it higher.
3. Entourage
While I’d say Entourage is as much of a drama as it is a comedy, it’s still easily the funniest show on my list. The characters are, like most HBO shows, excellent. The acting and writing are great as well. It’s a very original show as well. It follows four friends, one of which is the latest hot up-and-coming Hollywood star. He lives in a house in Los Angeles with his two best friends and his older brother. They live a life most guys dream of, which is why I think the show appeals so much to men. I don’t think you’ll find a funnier show that is also so well produced. It’s a rare thing for a television show to have both comedy and critical acclaim.
2. Oz
The highest of the four HBO shows ranked on my top 10 list. I’ve seen every season of Oz, and I was really upset to see it end. It put new meaning to “surprise ending”. As in most shows, you know nothing would ever happen to the main characters. They never would die. Well, this rule didn’t apply to Oz. Any character could die at any time. It left you feeling that anything could happen, and nothing was predictable. Even though at times, my favorite characters would be killed off, in the end it still made the show better. You just never knew what to expect. The show was always fresh, and over the six year span of the show, it always remained entertaining. It’s a pretty graphic show, but to anyone who enjoys a hard, gritty drama, I highly suggest checking out Oz.
1. 24
The easiest choice on my list. While many of the other shows in my top 10 are interchangeable in rank, that doesn’t apply to 24. It is without a doubt, my all time favorite TV show. It has my all time favorite TV character, and there just isn’t a show in history that can match the suspense and fast-paced action of 24. Every season has been incredible, without any down point in my mind. It’s a show that will keep you up until 5:00am on a work night, as it’s just impossible to shut off. I think I’ve finished each season within 3 days or less. If you are someone who likes any type TV show, then this a show you cannot miss. Most entertaining TV show in history, no question about it.
From WCBS:
Criminal charges have been dropped against a Mahopac man whom police charged last fall with animal cruelty and burglary for breaking into a barn and spray-painting three goats.
Drew Gagnon, 37, was arrested in November after police said he broke into the barn on Croton Falls Road early Thanksgiving morning and used orange spray paint on the genitals of the three goats owned by the Fiero family.
What enjoyment could this guy possibly get out of doing this? Was cow-tipping not a possibility? Was the next best option watching a bunch of goats run around with orange-colored balls? I don’t get it.
I have long been a fan of the Trailer Park Boys TV show. It’s one of my favorite shows, and it’s always been good for several laughs. The movie follows along the same path, and the translation into a 90 minute film works well.
Trailer Park Boys has this incredible ability to take ridiculous and silly characters and make an intelligently written show around them. I love the mockumentry feel of the show. The acting fits into the show’s intentions perfectly.
The film does a good job and following along the same storyline paths of the TV show. It also re-introduces the characters just enough to allow new viewers to understand them, and current fans to feel that they are seeing something fresh.
The highlight of the movie for me, was the work of Mr. Lahey and Randy. I find them both absolutely hilarious. Mr. Lahey is such a great character.
Ricky, Julien and Bubbles are great as well, and we also see appearances of several other show regulars. Ricky’s longtime girlfriend Lucy has quite an important role, which was nice to see as she’s usually pretty much just a side piece on the TV show.
All in all, I really enjoyed the movie. It surpassed my expectations, and gave me quite a few good laugh-out-loud moments.
My Rating: 8/10
For those of you that just can’t get through the rough days, this little gadget is here to help.
When pressing the lips on this key chain, it will come back with one of several programmed compliments. Some of the included “boosts” are: “You look fantastic”, “Wow I love what you’ve done with your hair”, and “You look great, have you lost weight?”.
Seriously, is anyone pathetic enough to actually buy one of these?
The website that sells these little gems actually suggests buying one as a Valentine’s Day gift. How would you like getting one of these from your significant other?
Last night, Vancouver Canuck Henrik Sedin broke Andre Boudrias’ 30-year old record for most assists in a season (62) as a Canuck, with 63. There are a still a few games left for him to add to his totals. Hopefully he, along with his brother, will finally begin to receive the accolades they deserve as they’ve quickly become two of the NHL’s top all-around stars.
There have been some rumors going around that TSN was going to win the rights to “Hockey Night in Canada”, as the NHL’s contract with CBC expires at the end of the year.
Thankfully, that won’t be happening, as CBC and the NHL have come to a contract agreement.
From The Globe & Mail:
The CBC and National Hockey League announced a new television agreement Monday that will keep Hockey Night In Canada on the air through the 2013-14 season.
The six-year contract extension begins at the conclusion of the current deal in 2007-08 and is worth about $100-million a year, according to sources.
I have no problems with TSN, but I just can’t imagine Hockey Night in Canada being on anything but CBC. It’s been a tradition since long before I was born, and I’m really glad to see they’ve worked out a deal.
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